a poem i wrote but too lazy to title

and i've got wounds for the wounds that never heal. and i've got words, so many words i cannot deal. You are gone but you won't go away. The sun is shining but the sky still gray. I'm hanging on..to forever and a day. Where have you gone? My sweetest of meadows. Where do you sleep when i lie awake? From the heavens, to a crumbling ghetto, i will wait. i will wait, i will wait.
beneath the hope of a dead god, i levitate beyond the fog,  the wind recites the epilogue , the girl and her 3 legged dog. They all lead me to every flaw that smashed the mirror when i saw. It's over now the harvest sown.  The echoes hushed, the seeds all grown. No turning back, no blood from stones. From the heavens to  demon's home. I will wait. but not alone. Between the words, beneath the wounds. The elephant has left the room. bye.

an untitled poem about i dunno.

its amazing what a grazing from a one inch razor can do to stop aging. One minute you're star gazing and praising the distance between yourself and the infinite equation, from conception of thought to painful memories that keep playing. The next you're on a table under lights meeting the fable. Long beyond stable and they're unable to bring you back with jumper cables. They dimmed the lights on the hazel as the eyes rolled back like a discount store label. But you can't put a price on life, a small slice and you're reaching heights beyond an angel's sight. Beyond a souls flight. So far away from that blade of grass that smelled so nice. So far from the smile you lost on the 15th night. Now you're a cadaver, a pile of matter who doesn't matter on stormy eves as lightning strikes and stars scatter. The vultures chatter as they gather and circle above the fallen ladder. A grazing, abrasion, hanging out in the basement. You put a price on life and he collected the payment.

gold

as i flirt with the shadows. as i tempt the darkness. I walk a thin line between compassion and heartless. my heart's on my sleeve and bloods on her carcass.
Her name was Gold and she was priceless. I met her in a crisis. A chaotic vacuum of mud and ice picks.
We were each others salvation. She was my cleansing, i was her inebriation. A one year vacation from rabbit ears on her head transmitting static stations. And when all was sorted i was escorted back to the house where the windows were boarded.
For 13 months I sat between these walls alone in waiting. waiting for never ending winter. night fall. but i never bothered  to see if it snowed. i watch the floors grow mold as the paint on the ceiling erodes. I'm still here. And so are you. I thought this watch was magic but my soul's still black and blue. Not a moment passes, not a breath escapes. that you don't wander through my mind like we were holding hands just yesterday.
And i can let go, but to another I can't hang on. Ive heard a thousand melodies but you're still my favorite song.
i. will. never. stop. loving. you.

the devil's advocate. a poem by me

i could think of a million reasons but i only need one. take a look in the mirror, turn around and run. i am your devil's advocate. it happened before you imagined it. i'm just here to steer you away from a tragedy. follow me through the alphabet where you'll be greeted happily by my words of praise and a slate that's immaculate. Deep down i know you wanna be free. deep down i know you wanna meet me. deep down you're miserable. Attached to a broken record that's playing a song out of key . slowly lift the needle and let go of he. You seem so dead, drop the weight, you're figure's already perfect it just needs a smile on its face.
You're trapped in a room without a view, closing in walls and heart that's blue. No need to settle, take the first step . i'll guide you back to the light where the rest of the beauty's kept. grow sweet flower, let your pedals flutter. Don't be a rusty nail in a wooden floor where broken hearts never recover. Let me show you life again. i know its what you crave. Don't fall into the system, let us gather here today. to save you from a path that leads you to an unfulfilled grave. I know you fear the unknown, but your going through the motions an emotionless inhabitant. step out from your comfort and join the devil's advocate. :)

simply watch the rain and sigh. Blooming flowers that deny. and the sun, the sun just dries the lonely.
Echos bouncing from the walls, as the paint begins to fall. And the dust, the dust just chokes the lonely.
in your scent i sensed an innocence. And i thought the same sentiment until i was sent into never ending descent. you're surprised by my dissent? if only you saw where i went. You offered a penny for my thoughts and these are my 2 cents.
As the embers spark the blaze. The grazing sting of your gaze. and the cold, the cold just froze the lonely.
Now i've reached the other side. You're alone in the storm. I'm not looking back, watch the bridges burn...burn me free from my only, my one and only.

death is my gift.

its a way out. some much needed respite. it's not a cry for help, cuz i am not desperate. Its a gift, a treasure beneath the ashes i sift. I broke from the script, improvising through a life in which i wasn't equipped. You lost your grip and i was dropped, into the darkest shadow of my most forbidden thoughts. When all was lost, i couldn't bare to exhaust the option of a life where i aimlessly walked. Its not that i was caught, i just have to stop. I gave you all i had as the mercury dropped. im trapped between the broken mirror and bloody walls. i finger paint a smiling face with crossed eyes before i fall. follow the trail to hell where i'm at peace with it all.
On the outskirts of a ghost town with no sound there's dead trees and cracked dirt. a broken window in the haunted house where i've lived since birth. Yours is the only reflection i see, in this stagnant pool of blood that's choking on me. My life expectancy is holding a clock right next to me. You were what's best for me now im just left to be. a hand full of pills as im fumbling toward ecstasy. I haven't slept because you're gone. Since you've left i've seen the darkness, with no sight of dawn. Burning a hole in my heart, acid reflux sucks. sinking on the raft flooded by my tear ducts. a sitting duck amidst the mire. a nail in your spare tire. I left my self open like a travel retreat flyer. I guess i was easy to read, now i stay between the lines as the clock hits nine. i hit an artery with broken hourglass, my love i'm outta time. I'm trapped between a whim and a tattered old quilt. Bury me at peace beneath the gallows where dead memories are built. Our last kiss led to this, a closed door a clenched fist. a life of sorrow for eternal bliss. I open my wounds and let death be my gift

the night breed.

what keeps you awake? heart break? the silence, the echoes, the glare of the tinted landscape? all is dormant on the external, the beauty of night, the home of the nocturnal. the itch is epidermal. i dont scratch. day breaks and and the clouds crack. i lay back until night fall. my early bird is the owl and my muse is on the prowl. With chaos in slumber i crawl from under. no need to hide from lightning, i am the thunder. everything is clear, and i fill with wonder. I am the night breed, born of darkness, end of summer. i can see the air, feel the glare of the moon from the pier. follow the stars to the beginning of nowhere. my mind is free to roam with with sinister shadows, swing through the gallows, discover new worlds and old pharaohs.
They day darkens what's internal. the night sheds light so i live nocturnal. The clock strikes the witching hour, my mind switches to power. opens up a realm where words and colors turn into meteor showers. In the coldest of worlds, in a land all alone. i have no other choice to call the night home. i am the NIGHT BREED.